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Is It Time Yet?

2/28/2016

I was talking to one of my heathen friends who is experiencing turmoil in his life. He had been fallen on by thieves and was greatly disturbed, seeking help, overcome by events, finding little solace. In short, struggling with the human condition. Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I don’t eat worms, perhaps I’ll die. He needed a lawyer. Not a regular lawyer, a really good lawyer. Really, in need of a miracle. He had a bad experience in Catholic school, he just wanted everything to go back like it was supposed to. I couldn’t help, and finally gave up. I was unable to communicate.

I thought back on what went wrong. I was wondering why we couldn’t get a miracle started up. I thought back to my five favorite miracles...

1) Feeding the 5000 - I used to work for Domino’s Pizza in East Lansing, and I know we delivered more than a thousand pizzas on weekend nights, and close to two thousand if they had a football game. In the Year -0- there was no Domino’s. This was a serious miracle back then. Today - 5 Billion people wake up hungry? I suppose a few die. Still - Thank You for our Daily Bread. The sparrows don’t worry.

2) Lazarus - Cut your finger? Skin your knee? Take a bullet in your head? Need a heart transplant? Is Ebola coming to your town? Doctors do pretty good these days, if you can get there. Did you die yesterday? Gee, that’s too bad. Actually, I have died and come back. Kind of regular now.

3) Calming the storm - Jesus was asleep in the boat, going from here to there. The boat was having problems. Wind and waves. Apparently nobody could swim. Somebody finally woke up Jesus and asked him to fix the planet...is that all? With Jesus in the boat, they lost their faith? Que pasa, vacas?

4) Pulling fish from the other side of the boat - Working all day, coming up empty, another hungry night approacheth. Jesus suggests try on the other side of the boat. Might get some fish...kind of sketchy, still commonly reported as a miracle. Still brings out the stress today.

5) Healing at a distance - One man’s son was confined at home and unable to travel. The father came to Jesus and asked him to divert his activities to go to the house and touch his son. Jesus told him that due to his faith, his son was already whole. Go home and have dinner.

Last but not least-

Crucifixion. Or was that Work?

We’re praying for a miracle in Philadelphia today. For one of those heathens we still have. Just to aggravate the Mohammedans.

:)

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Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?

2/28/2016

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It all started with Bobby. We were going to lunch. Bobby stopped in the hall, and got one of those looks. He said ‘I’ll get us a table. I’m just going to get a coke today.’ ‘Bobby, it’s Bacon Day!’ ‘I know, I forgot my money.’ ‘Don’t worry, I got $5 today. I’ll loan you $1.’ ‘OK, I’ll remember tomorrow.’ That was the beginning.

Bobby paid me back before English next day. He only had $1 so he was going to skip again. I loaned him another dollar before lunch. I told him I wanted another three cents next day. I had an extra dollar.three next day before English. This got to be kind of a habit. Bobby was kind of forgetful, and I had an extra fifteen cents every week. Ray usually sat with us, and he thought the whole scam was hilarious.

Ray forgot his dollar one day and asked me for a dollar. I reminded him the extra three cents. He was fine with it. Ray was also generally buying Betty lunch, and it was Bobby and Kathy, and Darren, Fred, and Joey at the baseball table, and the scooter bunch with Walter, and I guess I was really eating lunch for free that year. I might hand out thirty or forty dollars at noon every day, but I always got it back next morning in English, and everybody had lunch. Sometimes I’d forget my own dollar, then pretty soon I just stopped bothering Dad. He had work and stuff. Grownups have lots of things to do every day.

Actually I talked to Marge the lunch lady and got a discounted rate whenever I had a hundred lunches. She would just write them down and I’d pay everybody off. There was some teachers in there, who got their own discounts, and had another computation, and usually it would be three or four o’clock before we got it all worked out. The bank would be closed, and Marge would give me the deposit to drop off on the way home. First thing in the morning, I would give her the receipt from yesterday, and the twenty dollars to start out the register with.

Marge had more free time, and was getting her hair done, and was talking to Ellen the principal’s wife, and after Christmas I was also doing the high school, our other middle school, and three elementary schools. The elementary schools were just paper transactions, because little kids didn’t carry money every day, and just charged til the end of the month. I only charged two cents a day for little kids, just for the tracking fees. But the high school was big dollars. I think some of those kids had two or three lunches every day. The football guys all went through the coach, but if they ate three lunches, it was nine cents. We had a system, and it worked, and everybody benefited. People would join in at the beginning of the year, pay their dollar membership, and not worry all year long about lunch.

I had a kid in every school to do the early morning transactions, and all I really did was bring around the little bags of money in the morning to start, and take all the big bags to the bank at night and drop them off. But I was doing the whole county, and my bicycle just wasn’t making it, so I got the Maserati. Like the sales guy told me, it’s not like $350,000 all at once. It’s only $1,000/month. I have people eating lunch for $1,000+ every day.

Except for Saturday and Sunday, which was a problem. Me and Jenny were sitting on the patio at Starbucks up on the hill one Saturday morning, just vegging out and doing our e-mail, and people watching over at the MCD across the street, when it hit me. It was Saturday, and we were watching people eating lunch. Actually breakfast, lunch and dinner, and actually all day long, from five o’clock to after midnight. Not only MCD, but KFC, Subway, Panera, Raisin Cane’s...

I’m all out of school now. At this stage of my life I guess I would be in ninth grade. I guess I would be learning this algebra stuff, and maybe reading books about Chinese people, or Indians. I mean, I have Google on my phone, if I need to really know something. Me and Jenny manage most everybody who eats anything in Philly, New Jersey, and most of the way out to Pittsburgh. I got people everywhere making sure everything runs smooth. Frankie Soprano goes and sees my little problem people now and then. There’s no real problems.

Jenny says we got a fershur meeting with Bobby and his girlfriend Pammy tomorrow at Starbucks, so we got to be there. They want to buy a house or something. :)

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HSBC Doesn't Do the Nasty....Any More

2/8/2016

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http://www.thetruthaboutmortgage.com/hsbc-to-provide-400-million-in-consumer-relief-to-homeowners/

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Texas Crackpot

2/6/2016

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An elderly Chinese man had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole which he carried across his neck.
One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water. At the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.
For a full two years this went on daily, with the man bringing home only one and a half pots of water.
Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do. After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the man one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house."
The old man smiled, "Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?" "That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them." "For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house."
Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.
So, to all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!

For the 600 people who PHH is trying to foreclose today, I hope you find something valuable here. These pages are for you.

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I'm Looking for a Little Help from My Friends

2/6/2016

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Amicus@cfpb.gov-

I just noted on your site that you occasionally file amicus briefs on
litigation in progress. I'm sending you the attached files for your
consideration, and would greatly appreciate your participation.

My case is currently at 5th USCA #14-51224 in New Orleans, for fraud
in connection with wrongful foreclosure attempt by my mortgage
servicer. Basically, he made a bookkeeping error. In Texas, this is
not unusual. I was forced to seek protection in bankruptcy court, and
now I am working toward recovery of my own damages, certification of a
Class of members such as myself, and restitution of their damages.
Along with suitable penalties and fines, and valuation by a jury, I
realistically value the case at $1.5B. We have been in litigation for
four years now.

I represent Loretta Lynch in this matter, and yourselves as plaintiff
and party of enforcemnet. You will receive 75% of any collection, I
will receive 25%. You have the initial files on my complaint in your
files, and you have additional files on PHH, as they were your first
administrative enforcement action due to their fraudulent and unlawful
force placed insurance activity. Yes, sadly, PHH is still in
business. They service 2.9% of the mortgages in America, and
foreclose about 600 owner occupied homes per day.

Let's give them something to talk about,

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Author

Dave McCrae moved to Texas after Northwestern Steel in Illinois closed their doors and chained the front gate, seeking sanctuary in Chapter 13. I still have pension funds being held in my behalf by the Pension Benefit Guaranty Corporation. I expect the legal fees and expenses to eventually consume them all, if not already. Meanwhile I've retired, enjoy the sunshine in Central Texas Hill Country, and like to stay active in the community. I now own Tranquility Base, five acres tucked away back in the cedar breaks up in Texas Hill Country. I started this site to document the last years of legal wrangling between my old mortgage holder, PHH Mortgage, and myself, and our USAG, and our class, and share information among others in a similar situation who may find some useful knowledge. We never laid our case before a jury, but we were filed in District Court, Western District of Texas, Cause 1:14-cv-00733-LY, and appealed to 5th USCA #14-51224 in New Orleans, and are now Petitioners before SCOTUS. I have successfully defended the property against wrongful seizure action, not uncommon in America today, but not without added recoverable expense, on which I hope and pray the jury will look kindly one day in future. The criminal action adds another dimension, one which we hope will be pursued by the Department of Justice, under new management today by Jeff Sessions. As First Relator, of more than 28,000 or more other Class Members, I had decided to pursue such action myself as a qui tam action for the USAG and his/her delegated arm since 2014, the CFPB. My only motivation was the reward of 15-25% of the collection, to a maximum of $1,600,000, and the good feeling inside that comes from a complex task well done. I am a pro se litigant, and am able to represent myself before any Federal Court, including SCOTUS. Lis pendens, and we will one day appear. My draft writ of certorari is within these pages. My studies under George Gordon School of Law, my further readings in the law, in association with these pages, have now occupied more than four years, acceptable experience in Tennessee, Vermont or Wyoming, and I hope to credit the time spent toward a future bar exam and achieve legal certification. Many of these pages are suitable for the MSEE or the MSLPT, leaving only the 80 question multiple choice test and the MPRE. I typically do well on tests. I work among both Republicans and Democrats, and am a member of the Association of Certified Fraud Examiners in Austin, Texas. I proudly support Donald Trump and his campaign to restore normalcy to America. For service of process, I live at 350 Cee Run, Bertram, Texas 78605. But you already know that.

UPDATE: Our litigation phase is now over. I fought the law, and the law won. The judges have determined that our claims are implausible. We continue through other avenues, and are now focused on criminal activity, specifically white collar crime. I am no longer restricted by being a party at law, and am free to assist others in any way desired. I do not practice law, advocate no particular course of legal action, and accept no fee. I have founded TenTenSamurai Legal Services as a resource to other home defenders. Contact Us!

UPDATE: I changed my mind. Donald Trump has just lifted his hand from Lincoln's bible, and we are now under new management. WE THE PEOPLE! I have filed our draft Writ of Certiorari before SCOTUS, served and on display within these pages. CockleLegalBriefs is standing by for final edit. As of 21 January 2017, we are before SCOTUS. We represent a USAG yet to be named and confirmed. Eric Holder is long gone. Loretta Lynch is FIRED!

UPDATE: After careful consideration, SCOTUS has declined extension of time request to consider our writ of certiorari, and destroyed our check for filing fee. I own my house. PHH is out of business. All is well.

Is It Time Yet?

Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?

HSBC Doesn't Do the Nasty....Any More

Texas Crackpot

I'm Looking for a Little Help from My Friends

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